maybe you remember that I called her yesterday
& told her she needed to call all those people
& make sure they had her phone number
well
today they were calling me
& I gave them her number
BUT
I went to her apartment to take her her stuff
PLUS I wasn't sure if her walker was in the car
I KNEW
when they called
she had not abandoned her plan
her plan was to try to force me to be her caregiver by a fait accomplis
which is WHY
I refused to
HELP
BUT
she didn't need to get their number
because she never intended to use their service
SO
I took in her stuff
& I could tell she was there because her lights were different
SO
I was calling out to her that I was dropping off stuff
& she's LIKE
I can't hear you
SO
I went into her bedroom
& she was on the
FLOOR
I TOLD her the stuff again
& then turned to LEAVE
DON'T YOU WALK AWAY from ME
I can't lift you
& your phone is in your hand
NOW
she didn't say anything to me when I talked on speaker phone with the case worker
she didn't call or text
& she didn't call or text whenever she got on the FLOOR
she's didn't call out when I opened the door
& she didn't say anything about it
she just called out to me
that she couldn't hear me
I don't think she was on the FLOOR until she heard me come in
& I don't think
DON'T WALK AWAY from ME
is the tone you use when
you are hoping to get help
are relieved to SEE someone
WHY NOT
I asked
we have to talk
WHAT do we have to talk ABOUT
well money for one thing
NO, I say, I don't want to talk about money
I TOLD you
I was trying to HEAL our relationship
I TOLD you
I wasn't going to BE your caregiver
I tried for FIVE YEARS and I'm DONE
there is NO healing our relationship
YOU made it CLEAR that
I am not allowed to have boundaries
the ONLY thing I am allowed to do
is be your SLAVE
I TOLD you I was trying to heal our relationship and you were SO HORRIBLE to me
gaslighting and manipulating
if I come up with a way to keep you safe
you WON'T co-operate
I DON'T NEED clarification
I didn't think it was safe for you to be here
I WANTED you to go to an assisted living situation where you would be SAFE
& YOU chose to come HERE
call 911
or call the home health care
I can't lift you
& I said I wasn't going to have anything to do with it
I don't know WHY your here
at no point
did she ask for help
at no point did she seem in distress
it seemed super FAKE
& she hasn't texted or called since either
I DID make sure she had the home health number
I don't know what she expected
BUT
I don't think it was any of THAT
& I really KNEW
this was going to be
HARDCORE manipulation when I had the dream
I KNEW she would do THIS
BUT
I tried to make it as HARD as possible
there was NO middle ground
