So I was talking to the tarot deck
And I'm trying to get better acquainted with it
And I ask it what is the rest of the year going to look like for me
And it was interesting it was really interesting because it was two rows that were almost identical in format
Well I mean I'm not sure I laid them down in that order originally I think I rearranged them
But the first five card made that card makes sense for me because that was another card that I have always had trouble reading
And it gets strife as it's keyword
And then sometimes you'll get things like a challenge just for the fun of it or something weird like that
But this one now I understand it as being you're engaged in an activity that's maybe strenuous or maybe violent or has some element of struggle to it but it's really to build up a force of energy to build up the fire to create something
And then the 10
The experience is now feverish with detail and story, eyes are open to the lucid dream of it, conscious of the fullness of this manifestation.
And there was more but I think that that's the important part
And then the trail is the psychopomp
The cedar Rose has your back. In fire, You will be led to unpredictable vision, salves of meaning, adventure.
But then the dreamer the one that actually goes to the psychopomp isn't fire
In an interesting turn of events
She's often busy championing the underdog babies and she offers classes on the theory of knowledge--she can tightrope her way out of any argument or convince you to play the spoons, eat parchment, celebrate your birthday at the opposite end of the year... And she may lend you thalmaturgical words for a rough night
I mean wow
Thalmaturgical words
And now the bottom row is all about coral which is emotions
And that five is usually all about sadness and lost love and all kind of bad things so like if you get a five in your reading you're like oh f***
But this one the sonata will keep reverberating until every tear has bound release. Water knows how to cleanse the hostage heart, give it back to Joy.
so she suddenly it seems more like catharsis then oh f*** so that can't be bad right it's awesome
And the 10 the experience is now bathed in detail and story, eyes are open to the lucid dream of it, conscious of the fullness of this manifestation. Love fulfills itself and is felt to the very center of the beating heart and out through all things. The dream poet whispers that one and 10 are rituals of height and descent--The one and the ten thousand things--and the other numbers, The enthusiasm to fully live.
I just looked up falmaturgy and the definition that it has isn't specific enough
It's saying basically that thalmaturgy is magic
But thalamaturgy is a type of magic
Thalmaturgical magic is where you take a piece of something and you use it to have control over something bigger
So like an example would be a voodoo doll
But it wouldn't have to be a voodoo doll That's just the most obvious example
So you take an object and you make it represent something else and then you don't have to actually act upon the thing you're trying to work magic on You can just work magic on the thing you have with you The little representation
So I took the thalamiturgical words thing
Rather than being some kind of just magical words to get you out of trouble
I took it to be thalmaturgical
So it's back to writing
And the choral psychopomp wants me to know that the luminescent plankton has my back
Which I find surprisingly reassuring
I don't know if I'm just getting these amazingly prescient readings
Or if I just am so enamored with the way this deck is set up and the book is written that I'm creating these amazingly prescient readings
I ask this deck a question and it gave me this super clear answer and I was like oh my God oh my God
And then I went and asked the lover's tarot
which sometimes gives me answers that I understand and sometimes I'm just like huh
And I ask at the same question
And I essentially got the same answer
One of the cards was even the same
So like having gotten the answer from this deck I could look at those cards and go oh yeah that's the same answer
But it was a little less specific
And one of the cards was to have discs which I've mentioned I have always had trouble with
So when I look at it from that deck I still don't say oh yeah that means that I look at it and go huh
Anyway I love you very much
And I'm not even sure what kind of a sleeping schedule I'm on at this point
I mean that up 24 hours sleep 12 hours
That was pretty good I like that
But then that up 22 hours or 23 hours and then sleep 6 hours and then up like 20 hours and sleep 4 hours or whatever it was I just did something like that That's just disorienting
And I was going to go to sleep about 10:00 but now it's 5:00 in the morning again
So I don't know
I tend to have these times during the day when I get tired
Like I used to notice when I was in college I would have kind of a slump at 2:00 in the afternoon or so I would need some caffeine
but it seems like no matter how tired I am how little sleep I've gotten if I make it to 10:00
I might literally be up all night
I mean I was literally sitting here nodding off
And then just bam I was wide awake and interested in stuff
Plus I had food
Now sometimes if I have food then it makes me kind of sleepy
But if it's late at night and I have food then it wakes me up
Is that just me
Am I just really freaky I don't know
I love you very much sweetheart
I'm going to bed pretty soon
I'm afraid I can't be more specific than that
But pretty soon
