Okay I'm up actually I've been up for a few minutes cuz I looked through my phone before I got out of bed

The dust is officially here

My eyes are very itchy

And I'm extra congested

I had good dreams though

Nothing very plot worthy

Just a lot of good things

Good food I'm pretty close and going to carnivals and I don't really remember I should have said something before I started looking at my phone but again not very plot-worthy

I hope everything is good with you

I love you very much

I've not really done much to celebrate the 4th of July since I was that kid really

We used to go see fireworks every year

I guess while my grandmother was still alive maybe we went over there but I'm not even sure about that

No in fact I don't think so

I think my dad would sometimes try to cook out

But that was never very successful so I can't imagine that that was an every year thing

I think a few times I've read the declaration of Independence but I'm confident I haven't done that every year

and maybe I never really read it all the way through although I can't imagine that I didn't read it all the way through

But somebody on my feed was talking about the way Indians are depicted

And I just don't remember reading that in the declaration of Independence and surely

surely if I had read that it would have stuck with me but maybe not maybe it just washed over me like everything else

Or what I mean by washed over me like everything else was maybe I was drawn along in the flow of what it was saying and just excused it

Because if they mentioned Indians at all what else would they have said about them you know

And it's not like that attitude is a surprise

I went to Mount Rushmore

I've never really had a bucket list per se

but I had always wanted to see Mount Rushmore ever since I found out there was a Mount Rushmore

I thought it was really beautiful sculpture

Like they didn't actually finish it so it was still kind of rough and I liked that

And I didn't realize

I'm not sure how I didn't realize but I didn't realize that it was a sacred space to the native Americans

I mean of course it is

but I was thinking of it in the context of Mount Rushmore so I wasn't thinking of it in any other context

And no other context had been specifically brought to my attention at any point

So I went there

And and I didn't really like it

I went out and I sat there

And it wasn't like some of the other things that have been oh my God I've always wanted to see this and just you know overwhelming

It was just kind of empty the feeling

And so I didn't even look at it that long even though I had driven such a long way to get there

But I bought a book in the gift shop

It was a children's book about crazy horse

And I really liked that

but even in the gift shop there was nothing talking about how Mount Rushmore was really

At least even also

A sacred Lakota spot

and I've seen some people who say things like oh yeah well the Lakota just stole it from the crow

Well that's their business

That's not an excuse for you stealing it from them

It really isn't

why do people always come at you with those kind of arguments like they're really telling you something

And women are always talking about men man splaining things to them

And I don't want to argue with that because it definitely happens

But it's not just happening to women

So I'm not sure man's planning is really the right name for it although I guess it is in context

Anyway I had veggie hot dogs yesterday

And I think that was my big 4th of July thing

I may watch some fireworks on YouTube or somewhere else

That has kind of gotten to be my habit

Fireworks are pretty

They're probably not good for the environment

They're definitely scary to animals

So unbalanced they're probably bad and we probably shouldn't have them

but fireworks that have already happened aren't causing any extra damage so if I watch them on YouTube I guess it's not going to hurt anything

I don't know

I guess there's a lot of stuff going on in the world right now

And then there's not a lot of stuff going on in the world right now

Those things are both true

Or maybe the emphasis should be there a lot of things not going on in the world right now instead of not a lot of things going on

Things that would be going on or not

But you know

There's good stuff

And there's bad stuff

And the more you focus on the bad stuff

The more unhappy you get

So it only makes sense to focus on the bad stuff

Within the context of doing something about it

Not like creating a spiral down into depression

There are flies in my house

There were not usually flies in my house

but there are three large flies in the bathroom with me right now buzzing four large flies in the bathroom with me buzzing around right now I don't know what that's about

Wonder what fly totem means I mean what could flies be trying to tell me

Guess I'll have to look into that

I hope you're having a happy celebration with your family and that everything is really fun and good

I love you very much sweetheart