I'm not sure if any of it is related
I think it was Xtra sh*try to announce the
NEW bathroom policy
on trans awareness day maga Mike
I don't really expect anything better
AND
THAT specifically isn't my
FOCUS
I guess watching Ezra yesterday
brought up
FEELS
MAYBE
the fact that her energy felt SO MUCH
MORE
feminine than mine does to me
& in a VERY GIRL way
& I'm not even
SURE
HOW to explain what I'm talking about
it's like GIRL channeling
GODDESS
ENERGY
BUT it brought up all this
POWER
we walk up to their WALLS
& we make a
DOOR
the strength/vulnerability VIBRATION
SOME of us will DIE
I THINK of myself
in a lot of these frameworks
& yet I feel like I'm SO DIFFERENT
& I had a BUNCH of
FEELS
I think of myself as a girl
BUT
MAYBE not REALLY
I contain a girl maybe
& I clearly have all this broken/vulnerable stuff
& maybe I appear vulnerable
BUT
I said to myself
THAT is MORE truly feminine
than you've
EVER
been
& I don't know if I was being honest or mean
I don't anthropomorphize God
BUT
I'm not channeling the goddess
I am not in touch with
my divine feminine
or whatever
I'm TOO in my HEAD probably
I feel LIKE
I don't fit in
LIKE
I would love to feel like
I BELONGED in the way which
some of us will die
implies the understanding
I FEEL
STICKING OUT
in a socially
RELEVANT
way
which is, I guess, the way I celebrate
trans awareness
HOW
I represent
I don't KNOW whether
I fit into THAT community
any better than I fit into any other
& MAYBE
THAT
is just intersectionality
I've just been working on my GIRL
my daddy issues
my wounded
CHILD
AND
all this MENO crap
& I guess it was just jarring
to have the
I am not measuring UP
experience
in THAT
CONTEXT
while I was in what I would have thought was a period of much more fem/wom/girl energy
than normal
& I don't know WHY that's even a thing
& I still feel like
SOMEHOW
this IDEA of genders
is STUPID
(continuing)
