I have THINGS
I just can't
MAKE MYSELF DO
&
HOW
I can do whatever it is
that I HAVE to do
&
SO
it has NEVER made SENSE
I could do WORK
WHY
couldn't I do these OTHER things
BUT
NOW I understand that
WORK/have to THINGS
took a big toll on me
& limited
what I could do
FOR ME
AND
I KNOW I CAN do them
I just have to figure out
WHAT WORKS for ME
LIKE
quitting smoking
or dieting
&
it wasn't ever gonna be
the things people recommend as
WHAT I SHOULD DO
AND
he asked me about it
& WHAT I said
didn't sound like an answer to him
& he said SOMETHING about
IN BOX/ OUT BOX
SO
I TRIED AGAIN
WHAT I ultimately NEED to KEEP in MIND
when I AVOID doing SOMETHING
the IDEA is
I CAN'T DEAL with it
&
WHAT I NEED to REMEMBER is
I DON'T FORGET about it
I low key ANGST
SO
it's LIKE
compounding interest
or something
EVERY thing I'm
"NOT" doing
STILL takes SPOONS
& the ACTUAL DOING of it
is NOT as BAD
as my imagination of it
SO
it COSTS me
EVERY DAY
& is it REALLY worth all THAT
BECAUSE
you have to WANT to
you can't just
WANT to WANT to
to CHANGE
ANYWAY
he didn't have a client after me
& he chatted
& THEN
he THANKED me
for chatting
I'm not sure what any of that means
BUT
I hope you are having a beautiful day sweetheart 🫶🫶🫶
