he is semi fighting
with his family
about
the election
I told him
t*ump triggers me
& he's like, yeah me too
his niece blocked him on social media
his 91 year old mother
told him
he better work out his issues
before thanksgiving
last time we talked
he was not going to thanksgiving
I guess that's no longer his plan
they're all rich, apparently
hey, I say
if you need to skip thanksgiving
no no, he says
he will make nice
I don't understand
what am I missing
he told me again
I should be a therapist
I floated my nervous breakdown theory
& he's like
well maybe not exactly
BUT
you did have a break
just recently
I think he means
when I was trying to quit the job
BUT
surely
when I was triggered
back In May or whenever that was
surely THAT was a WORSE break
he says I'm so much stronger than I think I am
AND
I wonder
what does that really mean
I MEAN
I think I'm pretty strong
he hasn't asked me
what I THINK about my strength
I told him
at some point
when I was losing my sh*t
that I didn't feel supported
& couldn't he give me some
exercise or something
to not FEEL like
I was COMPLETELY losing my sh*t
& he had nothing
to me t*ump represents
MAYBE more than any single person
the qualities
that trigger me
he has those narcissistic traits
that flash from mom
EVERYTHING must be my fault
because she can't ever be wrong
REALITY might change from day to day
because everything is
external and right now
giving him/her what she wants right now
He's got that entitlement going
because he's a narcissist
BUT ALSO
because he is a rich white man
who only sees
the rest of the world
in terms of what he wants from it
"working the angles"
using small businesses to build things
then not paying them
so he ruins them
to get his sh*t cheaper
THAT was what he did BEFORE
when he was IN OFFICE
he USED the office
to whatever he
could squeeze out of it
for personal profit
& f*CKing aggrandizement
he can't distance himself from ROE
the way he would kinda like to
because he CAN'T
stop patting himself on the back for overturning
he takes the just say whatever
with no shame
not true, no problem
just say it
AGAIN and AGAIN
& people
will either think it's true
OR
they will not know anymore
what is and isn't true
& just slip into
apathetic acquiescence
his hardcore base
are grievance driven
& he rages with them
& SOUNDS "right" to them
because he has like a third grade vocabulary
they don't WANT someone
SMART or ACOMPLISHED
they want someone
who will make the bad people suffer
AND
this new statement of his
HOW the military
should STOP
the "radical left"
people are apologizing for him
trying to say what he MEANT
BUT
I'm pretty sure
he said what he meant
ENEMIES WITHIN
he says
ALIEN & SEDITION ACT
John Adam's SHAME
MAYBE
the military is supposed to keep me from voting
he doesn't really understand
HOW the country works
& he doesn't really CARE
I'm pretty SURE
it's all just
REALITY TV
to him
AND
AMERICA
even with the many ways
it doesn't live up to
it's promises
MEANS MORE than that
to me
