nite chat: 4:1

my chest was hurting today
and i'm all like
omg, the rona got my heart
but then i'm like shut up fool
you haven't worn a bra for like four or five days
your muscles are probably just sore
and i've had a bra on
since like 4:30 this afternoon
and viola no more chest pain
it is a little tight
but i can't tell that that's any reason for concern
i can breathe
maybe i'll sleep in the bra
i hate bras

i couldn't really focus today

i keep thinking about john prine
i wanted to pray for him
but i wasn't sure what to say

ok god, i said
i'm not sure what's best for him
i guess it depends on a lot of circumstances
that i don't know anything about
but
i don't want him to die
the idea of him dying makes me
just really sad
and i know he's lived a long life
but
he's got more to contribute to the world
right

god's not talking to me about that


i hope you are doing ok
the trip out to the grocery pick up
was more than enough outside for me today
but
i might need to go for a walk
i just can't focus
i've got to get the anxiety under control

sunflower
dandelion
marigold/calendula
elecampane

that's what i'm up to for fairly certain
they're all yellow flowered weeds
sunflower doesn't seem to be medicinal to people
only bees
but the other ones are

i love you very much
goodnight sweetheart