practice THAT shot
WHY
are the state lines confusing
surely after all this time
he doesn't need to be
CAGEY about facts
for legal reasons
is THIS like
a ribbing
related
to
something else
this is how I am
I don't think
most people do that
BUT
I FELT so like myself
NORMAL
just now
asking you this question
I have not felt like myself for a WHILE
IDK why the power outage
EXACERBATED
I think
PART of what is going on
I had shut down
SEX
BUT
I didn't THINK
about how that also meant
there was no like current
non-trauma over-write
for the old trauma
it was just like off
SO then I KINDA start trying to
re-introduce the CONCEPT
but it's new
nothing
NOTHING about sex
would be the SAME as it's ever been before
I don't know how shit works
I don't KNOW that it works
it doesn't work very well
for me
SO
I'm KINDA exploring THAT
I have fears I can't explain
BUT
I THINK
I think I understand you
better than
I wanted to give myself credit for
& I THINK
you are my sweetheart
I don't think
you ever want to hurt me
AND
I think you don't really understand
a bunch of stuff that is the
kinda stuff that's hard
to EXPLAIN
about me
I think you've been in love
with crazy girls before
BUT
I'm different
& through the years
you've tried to use some of those templates
& you were a little surprised
when none of them fit
MAYBE
that hooked you in
or maybe it wasn't such an UP time
& I was IGNITED by you
& that IGNITED you right back
I THINK
regardless of what other things
might be more important
to you
than me
there's a WAY in which
you need me
& I have complex myriad feels
discussed previously
before the trip
AND
on the trip
do you want to KNOW what
I THOUGHT
he's still confusing me
BUT
he's KIND
he CARES about me
I NEVER think
you would mean to hurt me
I am NOT being all weird now
because of anything you did
BUT
I'm messed up
because I WANT you bad
& to even TRY
is SUCH a RISK
for a lot of different reasons
LIKE I could lose you
is the only one
that ever really makes the list for me
I thought that's what you were upset about
back there when I was LIKE
I don't KNOW what I did WRONG
that I was going away
BUT
I thought recently that you
MIGHT have thought
that I was CRAZY
& you were worried
& THEN
I flipped out
about that guy
AFTER I got triggered
BUT
I have a VERY LOCKED DOWN
SOMETHING
he might not have been thrusting at me
BUT I took it as
FULL ASSAULT somehow
I gotta get THAT exorcised
I am having doubts
maybe I'm blah blah blah
YOU are wonderful
I don't think you're trying to manipulate me
I'm sorry I wanted to censor you
I take it back
INSTANT CLASSIC
db I flushed the mouse
new fan & new song in the rotation
ep234
goodnight sweetheart
I LOVE you VERY much
👾🫚
🫶
