I got up
I made soup
I zoned out pretty hard
I decided
that I needed
COTTAGE CHEESE too
I took most of my supplements
I brushed my teeth
which I usually do
BEFORE I eat
BECAUSE
if I do it after
I usually
VOMIT
which I did, a little, but felt disoriented
BECAUSE
it was red and oily
& I didn't recognize it as being anything I ate
(astixantin & DHA/EPA I realize now & I think I misspelled astixantin but I'm not looking it up)
I took a shower
I'm consciously thinking
FOCUS
on enjoying each moment
LIFE
is a series of moments
I got dressed
I took an Uber to see my mom
I had mail with me
I had items on a check list to be crossed off
her late tax return was sent back to her
she didn't sign it
I thought I could just have her sign it
mail it back
BUT
NO -- when I looked more carefully
it was ALSO missing
supporting documents for withholding
she sends this to an accountant
I'm LIKE
he keeps a copy, RIGHT
BUT
I STILL don't understand
he's got it listed here on the return
25b __ 2686 __ from 1099
25d __ 2686 __ extended
33 __ total withheld
what would they be withholding from
disbursement, maybe
would he just put it on the form with no backing documents & is jeffrey jim's son
JIM was the account she mentioned enough in my lifetime that I remember it
he's been retired for a while now
well, you need to call him
do these notes make sense to you
I was thinking I'd
LET YOU
do that
NO
you know him
you know your situation
it might be different if you were disabled in some way, but your mouth works, your phone works
& besides I really don't want to be involved in it
there were some other things
I couldn't get crossed off
which involved it being
a holiday
NOTHING is OPEN
on NYE or NYD
the world
apparently shuts down
it doesn't, you know
I never worked anywhere where we didn't work
NYE isn't even a paid federal holiday
yeah well you never worked anywhere
that didn't serve drinks or liquor
NOBODY works HERE on New Year's Day
we'll all just be in our beds
we won't even be
FED
WHY do you think that
everybody said see you friday before they left
because they aren't working
BOTH
I mean it might be all substitute teachers
BUT
I mean
NOBODY told you you'd be ALONE, right
there's no reason for you to think that
I FEEL like
that's just designed to be
provoking upset
SO
on that note
I've had as much fun as I can handle
I'm leaving now
I left her sitting in the meal room
told everybody happy new year as I walked by them the whole way out
called an Uber
went home
zoned out some more
didn't want to think about her enough to tell you about it
then I stayed up
but didn't watch fireworks or anything
drank ANOTHER bottle of wine
well
that's both celebration
& depleating inventory, right
emptying out the STUFF
some precious six bag of wine
you've had sitting around for six - seven years
BUT
I stayed up till five
& I can't really tell you what I did
