& the water pressure is
DEFINITELY
LOWER
although everything is working okay
I probably SHOULD shower
BUT
it's the WEIRDEST thing
I have all these
AVERSIONS
that I NEVER really
THOUGHT about
they never made SENSE until recently
I'm pretty sure
I even have described them as
TRANSITION issues
which is what they ARE
BUT
I didn't KNOW that was a
THING
SO
LIKE
I don't want to GO to SLEEP
ONCE I AM asleep
I don't want to WAKE up
I WANT to get CLEAN
BUT
I don't want to be WET
THEN
ONCE I'm in the shower
I don't want to get OUT
when I go to the therapist
AFTERWARDS
I sit in the bathroom for
ten minutes or
SOMETIMES MORE
BEFORE I can go talk to my security guard friend
I was KINDA aware of all this
BUT
NOT REALLY
