billboard
on my way to work
my therapist texted me
they have mild food poisoning
so no therapy tomorrow
I'm torn between TWO THOUGHTS
BOTH of which
are, I think, slightly
CRAZY
one is that he just wants the day off for something
no one has luck this bad*
*for the record, I verified the air conditioner story, yes I was slightly shocked myself, but I enjoy talking to the security guard**
**he's from Kenya I think, we talk mostly about the weather, he calls me ma'am which feels good for the first time ever because it just sounds good-natured not whatever it sounded before, and I just found out he has played tennis since he was five years old and still plays, he just seems like a very genuine person***
***why do I feel like some people are genuine and some people are not-- this is something that I need to think about because I just thought of an example where the person who feels not genuine to me, she's not like lying or anything it's just it feels constructed not false, I'm afraid part of that might be me
JESUS
I didn't even get to the second f*CKing thought
THAT one
I had been wondering if I should tell him
DESCRIBE
there is some thought
that the whole
TIME walk
STOLEN hour
is a slightly dissociative experience
& then there is some thought
that the universe delivers to me
WHAT I need
when I NEED it
there is some thought
you got some skin in the game
TRYin to LOOK crazy
SHUT her DOWN
