i wonder if this counts as a manic episode

i stayed up late
really really late
i'm gonna get 2 hours of sleep
and i spent a bunch of money i really cant afford to spend
probably
on paints
i'm hoping they are the 12 perfect colors
but
probably i should have a cobalt-ish blue
and
i'm not mad for french vermillion
i'd rather have the rouge vermillion
but
i cannot mix oranges with a blue based red
also
watercolors are tricky
but
the tiny travel case
with 12 colors
it made me mad with the painting passion
and i've been missing painting
especially since
you've gotten really good
but
i tried and tried to talk myself out of it
so
that's why
i wonder if it counts as a manic episode

i guess i have to paint the oracle cards now
or
paint something, anyway

i love you sweetheart