deep blue

i open my eyes
i have melted into the earth
or maybe i'm in a bed
i take a breath and look over at you
who smile at me
so maybe i'll melt again

your skin is moving
no, wait
it's an image
the ocean
is lapping across your chest
the clear blue sky across your face
and where, do you think, is the deep blue sea
i touch you
and you feel solid enough
but the call of the sea is stronger
and
i dive
i hear you calling me
but i've completely disappeared into your depths
i laugh and swim on
delighted that
if only i can learn to contain the sea as well as you
that story i always want to write about my body making pearls
changes from a bloody nightmare
into something
where you have to open me
an entirely other way

and it's so so blue
and quiet
and i want to keep on swimming
but
you reach in, pull me out
i start to cry

hush mermaid
licking my salty tears
and then we roll together
oscillating
in the moving non-movement of the wave
the physics of which was always just beyond my grasp

i love you you know, you say almost a whisper

like the ocean, i ask

if you like, but any force of nature will do

and with a wink
you became the wind