feeling from the depths

i don't remember
what i dreamed
i remember
the feeling

like
a
hug

a
needed
hug

and
i don't
know

if
i know
why things are what they are, or
what any of it means, or even if it matters
that i understand any of it, because, maybe it
only matters that i
love you

can be with you in spirit
even when my body
isn't

and tonight, beloved
i imagine the feel of denim
touching you
through your clothes
tentatively, like a girl
let me spin the bottle
meet me in the closet
for however many minutes in heaven it is

paint the story of your love
on my flesh

what shall we use for paint

we could pick berries
into the rolled upward end of a t-shirt
crushing them in one palm
on the grass by a stream
a creek

i roll into you
all the beautiful exploratory boy-girl moments
that i never really had
and never really knew i wanted

i will lick dewberry juice from you


another night
we can be grown up