this is stuff i would edit out, but maybe stuff you should know, so yucky outtakes

i slept super late
in fairness
i was up super late
after i fell asleep in the chair
i was up another few hours
off and on

the last few days
i've been hormonal
i started to say depressed
but
that doesn't cover it
it's been
hopelessness and anger
and wistfulness
some other less nameable states

there's been some mucus down there like there might be
something still going on
and that
gives me some emotion as well

i'm trying to get this hormone stuff down
pregnenolone and progesterone
and maybe i need estrogen
my body is demanding lots of soy milk
i actually feel better since i'm back on the soy
after the eggnog of xmas

i want to see you
but
full disclosure
i'm not sure when i'm gonna be able to do that
my finances are pretty bad right now