i really like this new girl at work

she's funny
and off-beat
and
a really bad influence
like
between us
we are an h.r. call waiting to happen

if maybe like religo girl happens through

like
the other day she says she wants to go see madame butterfly
which as it turns out is a new ballet rather than the opera i thought
and i'm all like:
i will totally go to any ballet anywhere anytime
[cause i got no one interested in going]
and she's all like:
yeah the girl is laying in the bed
and the guy's all [and she kinda mimes him jumping her]
and i said, hey that's my kinda ballet

and
before i even think
i'm saying:
now, you know they are not gonna have live insertion at the ballet
and she cracks up
but not like the totally new
maybe 22 year old
and completely unvetted new guy in the break room

see, bad influence

today
i am totally exhausted
with mountains of crap to move
cause i'm doing this change-over
and shit was delayed, and whatever

she comes up and says:
is there any way i can help you
and i'm all like: yes, i could really use some help

so she wanders off
and
a few minutes later she says:
are you sure there's nothing i can help you with

bitch, i said yes
i know that's not the kind of thing that's believable
coming from me
but
yes, please help me

so we move a bunch of boxes
and
i'm making my
i'm-lifting-the-boxes-noise
and she's like:
watch out, or you'll get muscles

oh, you haven't seen my arms
[so i show her]

that's just like a dude
ooo and look at you're veins
i bet the doctors love you

yeah
it's cause i'm transparent pale
when i was a kid you could play trace the vein

she just has comebacks to everything
and
she's teasing me
but
not in an annoying way
which is rare-ish