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i dreamed
that i was traveling along with some friends
and i was having some issues
the girl
[and maybe i should mention here
that i don't know any of these people in real life]
says that i need to be on medication

then i see
a couple walking along together
with children [3?] on their shoulders
and all of the children have apples for heads
i gasp
i describe what i see
she says:
see, medication
but i try to explain:
i just would like to know what's actually real
but medication will stop me from being myself
i don't want to change
i just would like to know when i'm seeing something that no one else sees


and
i've been a little depressed
i went to dinner with my friend
whose wedding is coming up quickly
and she's having the usual types of issues
but
she's saying alarming things

she's saying that she doesn't think his music is going to work out
she's saying that he never actually filed some paperwork to complete his degree
almost two years ago
and that if he would just do that
he could get a better job
she's not telling him to quit his music
she's telling him
that he needs to do it for long enough to be sure he's ready to quit
or else he will always regret it

these are not the kind of things i ever expected to hear from her
it's kinda making me want to tell the guy to run
i can see the seeds of her expectations changing
with the dreaded institution
and it makes me sad

he kinda roped me into an hour long [basically] therapy session
with another girl by telling her:
if you're concerned about it you should talk to [my name]
she's like yoda or something

i cannot explain how touched i was by that statement

when i went to log in to my computer this morning
i couldn't [just for a second] remember the password
and, instead, started to type civet

i think i'm slightly out of sorts