they say you see things when you're supposed to, but i don't know

i read a message yesterday
before i went to bed
it was sent to me in october of 2012
but i don't remember ever seeing it

could i have forgotten it

the girl i had the affair with
the year before i met you

she was saying:
i saw your mom, it was like fate
i still think about you

me and m we broke up
she's
 married now
to a man
k is fifteen

and her email
it's the nickname i gave her
that she initially
she didn't like at all
until i told her what it meant to me

she's still holding on to it

now
don't get me wrong
i don't want to hook back up with her

and she got engaged two months later
so
i'm not sure how to interpret that
but
i feel like
something
i should have responded, somehow


she didn't want me then, though
she is the one i always think of
when i think
about you
and her


so
i don't know what that means
but it made me
sad