i can't remember what i dreamed last night

i know
when i woke up to pee
i thought
i really need to remember that
but i don't really wake up when i wake up to pee
and
i forgot

i've had a headache today
i feel, generally, bleh

i don't know what to say to you lately

i should be writing you something
but
i don't know

i keep wondering things
some are about you, your motivations, your beliefs
some are about me

i'm restless, i guess
and
my friend i got weed from moved away
and
i got her guy's number
but
whatever
i haven't done that yet
so
maybe i'm more sober than normal
and
it's a drag

i feel like i'm meant to continue telling you things about me that you don't know
and
i'm resisting


ok
here's something

i hate to be called lady
and most especially in the configuration ladies
i mean, if you're play acting lady blah blah or milady  is awesome
any use that references courtly love would be alright
but
any sort of 20th century chivalry is suspect
you can hold the door for me
if and only if
i can hold the door for you
and lady holds a whole social contextual can of worms
which i find distasteful if not vaguely offensive
and don't call me ma'am either
no sir


of course
if it's used quasi ironically
it often becomes okay again

hey ladies