once i had a clothes line

there's a thing with clothes
or maybe i just think there is

if you've worn em once or twice
and you didn't really get em dirty
then after a while
they just kinda air out

now
i haven't tested this out in a while
but i'm on this long stretch of not doing laundry
just kinda hand washing
bits and bobs

i don't wanna get too deeply into it
the point is
i wanted to wear these pants
they're green
i wore them probably once
months ago
and i haven't done a green load

now
now i have to do green loads
and red loads and purple loads
and white loads
it's enough to make your head spin
i used to just do laundry
everything was black and it didn't matter

whatever
the pants aren't clean
and they've been on the floor for months

so
like a twenty year old
i pick em up and sniff em
they smell like
nothing at all
theory proven, yet again

but
the act of doing it
reminded me of when i had a clothes line

something you don't know about me
i wash everything on delicate
and i hang almost everything

i've started playing little games with the dryer in the last year or so
drying things partially
drying things i care less about

whatever
fundamentally i hang my clothes to dry

but
when i was twenty-seven
i lived in a house with a yard
and it had a clothes line

i'd walk to the detached garage
the door always open
wash my laundry

and then hang it on the line

and
this is one of the touchstone experiences

when clothes dry on the line
they come out a little stiff
not fluffy like if you use dryer sheets
[which i have never in my life used--
i guess i really am a hippy
biocleen soap with grapefruit seed extract
and no no no to the dryer sheets]

i'm not maybe mad for the stiffness

what i am mad for
the smell

clothes from the line smell of the sun
that won't make any sense unless you've smelled them
but
i love it

and today
when i smelled my pants
it brought the memories of the clothes line and the smell of the sun
crashing back to me

and
it was a much better day