well, the interwebs seem to have righted themselves

I don't feel as much better as I thought I did last night
but
I got up
I gathered up the trash
and
I took it out
it's trash day
and you have to have it out
by a certain time
but
we only get one a week
so, if you don't put it out
then you're schleppin it to the dumpster
which is not close
so I didn't want to miss it


however, that really seemed
strenuous
which, of course it isn't
I scooped the poor cat's box
which I'm not sure
when I did last
it didn't seem too bad
so maybe I've been doing it
I just don't know
it's like I haven't been
with myself
anyway
that really took it out of me
so I think exercise may be off the table


I am so so thirsty
I want coffee, of course
because it's morning
but I'm out of milk
I needed to go to the store Sunday
milk ran out yesterday
but
I don't even really want it
because I'm so so thirsty
so I'm drinking iced tea
which I made last night before bed
but
I'm hesitant to drink iced tea
in the morning
because when I was a kid it made me vomit
if I drank I in the morning
maybe something to do with the tannins
that's funny
that's one of the few things
which has made me vomit
that never became an avoided item
it was just in the morning
I mean, you wouldn't stop drinking iced tea
that's just crazy talk


I may go back to bed
for a little while
I've been up an hour
but
it seems like a good idea
I have to go back to work
tomorrow
that's gonna suck


I'm gonna have to retrain the cat
he gets food on this alternating schedule
wet food in the morning
dry food when I come home
wet food when I have dinner
half a can and the rest before bed
and some dry if I stay up late
but then he's negotiated treats
if he greets me leaving


and I've just been so out of it
and the times have been so off
that when I've given him wet
he looks up at me and tells me
he's owed some dry too
and i just did it
then too
I've been confused about
when I've fed him
so I'm sure he's gotten extra meals
I'm really not happy
it's like i was a multiple
and just coming back
except
I sort of remember it
so at least I don't have to
Momento it all together
I just know I fucked up


does that happen to you
where you get sick
and your brain stops working right


maybe not
maybe you don't get sick
anyway
I hope this makes you feel loved
that I shared this with you
and not just like
wow
she's a freak
I know it probably wasn't interesting
but
whatever
this is what my last few days have been like