my broadband connection went down, i lost a paragraph, and i decided it was a sign to wait on finishing that last post, but...

when i was driving
i guess it's yesterday now
i saw, like almost first thing
a buc-ee's bumber sticker saying:
hug a [buc-ee beaver logo] today
and that made me wonder:
is it a reinforcement for whatever it was
every time i see it
because it was something about you and me
and a baby, i'm pretty sure

so i was wonderin that
and i was thinking:
i should ask to see some really over-the-top-dressed
pregnant woman for reinforcement
but then i didn't specify
how she should be dressed

and so of course
it was like hochschwanger central all freakin afternoon
and a totally adorable seventeen month old flirted with me
and i'm (to his mom): does he flirt with everyone
and she rolls her eyes: yes

but then
and i kid you not
this woman walks in
in some sort of scarlett red silk wrap tunic
and my first thought was:
wow
that is over the top

so
even though
it seems unlikely
on oh so many levels
the universe [or god or whatever]
seems invested in my believing that
you will make my dreams come true
although
maybe not all of them
i have some fantasies
i don't even tell you about
because they aren't remotely titillating
they are just pruriently romantic
not sweet romantic like the sofa thing
but hard-core-donkey-show romantic stuff
stuff i'd be embarrassed to admit that i actually thought
you were actually maybe gonna really do, unprompted
at various points
but, hey
i know
you're not sittin around
carvin me a skull ring