THIS
was what you wanted
that you were saying you wanted to
like forever be here for THIS
& that you were trying to
let me see that you
were really
committing to some
life of the mind
with me
I thought there was some
possibly
that you wanted
to get to know me irl
to see
BUT
I thought
when this went down
I needed to TRY to maintain
SO
I tried to use other channels
I wasn't gonna be all
bare my soul
in public
although I kinda did
BUT
you don't really
LIKE me, I think
MAYBE
I'm somehow more an IDEA
which I would say is
FAIR
except I've been baring my soul to you for twenty something years
I needed to focus on my own head
for a minute
& the universe broke my blog
to give me the opportunity
& you immediately
realize you are
done with me
SO
MAYBE
that was what needed to happen
I hope that was true
that you were
BETTER
thank you for breaking my brain
thank you for being there
making me feel
loved and cared for
thank you
I LOVE you VERY much
I'm sorry
I wasn't enough
