i hurt my back

i left work early
i couldn't stand or sit
or walk or move
without discomfort
and
what i really couldn't do
was
bend
or lift things
just couldn't

i've spent all day
soaking in epsom salts
and laying on heating pad
rubbing bengay

stretching

and

i'm worried

not that i'm permanently damaged
i'm sure i'm not

but
i've got another nine days of this

and
i'm not sure i can


that has distracted me
and
i did want to try to tell you about that dream
the balloons, in space
it was cool
and
i performed the heart surgery
it was
sort of
shamanistic

i love you
and i'm sorry that i haven't had much
the last couple days
i wanted to
i'm thinking of you

oh wow
hurt back and all
i just took that dirty
the particular angle i'd like you to rub my lower back
it's been drifting back to renaming everything in the garden
animate, sensual
for a while now

do you like that more
sometimes if you do i think that's good
sometimes i'm not sure about that
i wish

what i wish
is that i knew
something that i don't know currently, about you

but i don't mean
general stuff
doesn't need to be sexy

i wish that
and that i was as tough as i think i am