I did recognize the big life reset button though, and this year has been about that to a large degree.
The jacket was a really early base level move. Instead of buying a coat or a heavier jacket, I acknowledge that I live someplace where it doesn't get that cold. If you can block the cold wind humidity and rain, that covers 90% of what you need a coat here for. I've never liked windbreakers or hoodies or any of that light outerwear sporty whatever. Also, I was on a slow weight loss journey and I didn't want to spend much on anything-- so the jacket was thrifted on eBay for I don't remember how much. I looked it up-- $12. It was a Macy's brand and that felt comfortable because I used to buy most of my clothes from Macy's back in the 90s. It is a metallic gunmetal and a thin papery fabric. I don't think it's amazingly attractive, but I think it's not ugly and is highly utilitarian. I've been super pleased with it. I like the color and metallics are pretty neutral now, it seems to me. All this is to say it was never designed to be any sort of fashion statement, it was designed to be a normal non -attention grabbing article of clothing, but I do get a pretty fair number of compliments on it.
So when I went on my return to the world trips: a driving trip to Fort Worth to see Robert Motherwell and a plane trip to Portland, Oregon the raincoat/ windbreaker made the cut to the rainy place. Everybody that I told about this trip ask me why I picked Portland Oregon. I'm going to tell you what I told them. I really like Seattle but I've been to Seattle a few times. I flew into Portland years ago to go to Eugene, Oregon and I saw just enough of it to make me think I wanted to see more. I had developed a real aversion to flying which had already started pre-pandemic due to the unpleasantness of flying as a fat person, but had reached an anxious crescendo with COVID. It's really about getting over my fear, I told them.
I have other motivations, only some of which I am prepared to disclose. The driving to Fort Worth from Houston was hard. I did not enjoy it. The old love of road trips, not back. The plane was hard. I did not enjoy it. I did fit in the seat however and that was awesome. The planning by which I mean both the planning of the actual trips and the planning for the packing is the kind of thing that I think I do differently than most people.
(continuing in next post)
