(is that the word I want?)
AND
I can see already
(technically THIS is also a 23 yr old weight)
I'm not going to be the weight I want
in 20 pounds
I am pleased that my shoulders
and upper arms
are not excessively bulked
I feel like my neck
though still not long
doesn't have that stacked look
and my shoulders, though unfortunately
slightly rounded forward
are downright BONE CENTRIC
SO SO HAPPY about that
I'm still a little scared at what my abs
might someday look like
BUT
I have come to terms with the fact
I might not lose the meno belly
UNTIL THE LAST
SO WHATEVER on the abs
I think my ass will be okay
and I suspect my legs will be
less than I hope for
I am not going to do that surgery
where they insert bone into your femurs
about 3"
in each thigh
would fix my proportions right up
I think
I know I have a bunch of muscle in my back
but so much back fat
dear God
I must be tasty
I think I have those weird side muscles
there's still fat
so I can't be sure
but
I'm pretty sure
ALSO
my rib cage feels wrong to me
I don't think I'm like full on deformed or anything
I feel like I must be within parameters
but it feels too wide
and squished
but maybe
my roundness expectations are fantastical
