maybe what i should do is tell you how i have answered the question

i don't remember the first reaction
it just didn't really register at first

then
then i thought maybe
it was a
if we're still together at x time...

then
then i thought maybe
she was pregnant
and either
threatening not to be
or
somehow needing it
in other words
maybe
noble

i liked this answer
though it hurt
it gave you
a reasonably good reason to be giving up
a negotiation point
that you'd held onto
for many years

then
then i thought maybe
maybe she was crushing you
nagging and looking in corners for the absence of dust
and you just thought it would be easier
easier all around
if you gave her security:

i love you baby
so much, in fact, that let's get hitched

or
that she threatened to leave you

that you weren't sure about me
what you thought about us or me or you and me
that you didn't want to be alone
or
you didn't want to be without her specifically
that she was the one you couldn't let get away

that i was, mostly, important for creative juices
flowing, and whatnot
something you didn't want to loose
but not something you needed--
you're plenty creative

fires to be put out

if it's meant to be...

that's consistent with usness
you could still use the loss
honor me


but
through the depression
i found
the only answer that really worked

he did it because he wanted to

he's a grown man

i just don't know why