I dragged a table and stool onto the stoop so I could drink my coffee in the sun

I hope you are having a beautiful day 

even in this WHACK world 

I watched this new 

channel guy

& he SEEMED to be describing us

in a lot of ways

BUT 

of course I'm not sure about what's going on with you right now 

he said 

you were going through a 

HERMIT phase

that was enriching you greatly

that it was something you

MAYBE had avoided 

in your life before 

BUT 

NOW

it was bringing you just what you need

& you were pretty into it 

& that it was in some ways 

inspired by my recent struggles 

& in other ways

the THING 

that's needed to bring us together 

the channeled message as a real thing 

IDK about but I tend to think they are

at least a synchronicity thing

& the part about me was

supporting to me

BUT 

I don't really feel like I can

project my journey 

ONTO you

SO

if you're doing a HERMIT thing 

then I hope it's going great

& if you're not 

I hope whatever you ARE doing is going great

I LOVE you VERY much sweetheart 

the better check in

I'm still experiencing the world as

STRANGE 

& I'm still FEELING emotions

BUT 

ALSO

I'm still doing SOME shadow integration 

I'm noticing my BODY de-escalating 

& MOSTLY 

I'm trying to FEEL -- I keep forgetting the WORD 

SOVEREIGNTY 

& it's a little bit jarring 

because I just WAS

tapping my chest

LIKE 

along my collar bone

TELLING 

myself -- you're SAFE now

BUT NOW 

I'm NEEDING to FEEL this NEW THING that I'm not AT ALL even SURE I understand 

& there are different ways to do it, probably 

& MAYBE 

I DID understand 

BUT 

from a different framework 

& NOW

it seems like something completely different 

I'm serious about it 

& I heard something on a cchannelledd*

message

which I'm now using 

as an abbreviation for the whole process 

what the message said -- the universe is lining it all up for you and it needs you to

DECIDE FASTER 

BUT 

not like

HURRY 

LIKE 

ENGAGE with your DESIRES

OR

what do you think you want 

what do you like

what would you

ENJOY 

maybe I'm not conveying this well

there's this state I'm trying to get to

where the desire to eat delicious food 

& the desire to have a fit body

have a conversation 

reach an agreement 

meet on some kind of rational ground

& the f*CKed UP scripts can all be burned

I am being kind to myself 

BUT 

I'm ALSO

EXPECTING -- LEVEL UP

*these words make me mad

check in

I LOVE you VERY much sweetheart 

I want to ASK

WHEN 

do we get regime change 

I'm feeling 

STABLE 

but

not outside the state of flux

if THAT makes ANY sense 

march 1st

I'm going to try to sleep now 

goodnight sweetheart 

I LOVE you VERY much 

snakes that aren't snakes

DUDE 

I was feeling better 

& I started thinking about the world 

& that brought me to a 

STRANGE place 

the world feels strange

I FEEL like I should KNOW 

WHAT the DREAM 

MEANS

it was SO STRONG and I had it earlier 

in the course of the 

SLEEP 

REMEMBERED it

THROUGH 

I'm pretty SURE 

OTHER DREAMS 

which 

I DON'T remember 

THAT 

has GOT to MEAN -- I thought it was 

well, I mean, I guess it could just be memorable 

BUT 

the way MY MIND works 

I'm LOOKING for 

MEANING 

it was SO REAL -- it looked just like a snake

the shape 

of the HEAD was 

SO 

realistic 

it was moving it's head around in a kind of 

MESMERIZING 

way

BUT 

if you followed the body upwards 

it was clearly 

NOT 

a snake

although, honestly, not necessarily a 

CATERPILLAR 

clamped it's MOUTH to this

SKINNY little 

TREE

the KIND

that MIGHT pop UP in your 
YARD

without your really noticing 

was it in a

YARD

I don't THINK so 

it was MORE 

LIKE 

a NATURE documentary 

with GOOD camera

SHARP

hi def

it was

as I SAID -- mesmerizing 

& I've seen THINGS similar enough to KNOW 

they're NEVER as REALISTIC as ALL THAT 

which was primarily 

WHAT MADE it -- mesmerizing 

strange dream

I suspect I had a lot of dreams 

BUT 

the ONLY one that I remember is 

there was this

CATERPILLAR 

it LOOKED like a 

SNAKE

it's tail was the snake's head

& it attached itself to 

a small tree 

(sappling?)

& was lashing itself about 

SHOWING 

all it's movement and gyrations 

& it was COMPLETELY convincing 

as a SNAKE

💯 percent 

I looked it up now that I'm awake 

my dream was MUCH MORE realistic than 

these caterpillars are IRL 

the real ones are good 

BUT 

birds have an instinctual aversion to snake shapes -- even if they were raised in captivity and don't have ANY experience with snakes

I'm not sure what that means 

is it related to 

ILLUSION 

or CAMOUFLAGE 

or SURVIVAL 

or things that LOOK like SNAKES

I LOVE you VERY much

goodnight sweetheart 

I think I'm doing better