goodnight sweetheart sunday january 18th

I STILL haven't 

contacted my therapist 

I need to sleep 

I LOVE you VERY much 

I hope everything is beautiful where you are

hope to see you in dreamland 

TONIGHT 

thoughts Sunday January 18th

I maybe had TOO MUCH caffeine 

regardless

I had

ANXIETY 

not extreme 

BUT 

I'm not stressing about all the

THINGS

I want to be on top of

it's a fair number of moving parts

& I'm not stressing about it 

BUT 

I think some

ANXIETY 

just, ya KNOW, bubbled UP 

I watched little pieces

some skin care

some fountain pen 

SOMETHING else -- I can't remember 

BUT 

if it gets where I'm not paying attention 

I SWITCH it 

& I'm switching a fair amount 

I haven't needed to take ibuprofen for my knee

I'm taking chlorella 

STILL 

or AGAIN, since I missed a DAY

& I stopped taking the

VEGAN omega3 & astaxthin 

SO

I need to get THAT back up & running 

I saw a thing

MICHELLE Obama

is maybe 

running for president 

& I have FEELS about it 

whether it's true 

or not

I don't like the dynasty vibe

I don't LIKE 

that he didn't walk any of it 

BACK 

after 
W

I LIKE

HER

I liked them, I like him

& I guess it got me thinking about 

the way THINGS have been 

GOING 

&

she GAVE him 

HER nobel prize

& I guess that's part of what brought about

something about guantanamo bay and something bout all these cows 

I'm trying to find 

the balance 

where I'm NOT freaking out 

AM I supposed to let myself FEEL 

ANY of what's going on 

I'm NOT SURE if I 

REALLY do

that I can 

HANDLE it

TOFU Sunday January 18th

I have a new tofu recipe 

I used to make this

tofu scramble 

modification from the vegan cool girl -- I can't remember her name -- isa Chandra Moskowitz

BUT 

pretty modified 

SO

I wanted to see if I could do it with the EARTH

it's like a brown gravy

KINDA

FIRM TOFU

cooked in some MCT c-8 

+ nutritional yeast 

+ EARTH

+ a spoon of bone broth concentrate 

+ a splash of vegetable broth 

+ a big squeeze of 

GARLIC PASTE 

I was pretty

pleased

it's cold

here

tarot synchronicity

OH

& I did a reading today

WHAT

I said, is the purpose of my life 

& it said 

THREE of WANDS

EMPRESS 

THREE of PENTACLES 

three threes

more thoughts

OH

AND

something about guantanamo bay

& something bout all these cows

SO

maybe I'm doing some

american retrospective 

wandering minds

move around 

goodnight sweetheart

that line

in a land of half a billion guns

no where to turn to

no where to 

RUN

has been running through my HEAD 

& the DEVIL was a PRO

which is from an older song that had some similar configurations

& some other

thoughts about you

I'm kinda surprised I didn't write anything 

I thought about you 

OFF and ON all day and

what you might 

be doing

I need to go to sleep 

I LOVE you VERY much sweetheart 

I hope you are having fun 

meeting new

FRIENDS 

you are 

MAGIC 

slightly weird day

I decided 

NEXT WEEK 

might be kinda stressful 

I slept LATE 

TODAY

then I didn't do much 

I tried some

variations on soup

which

honestly 

we're not completely successful 

I'm experimenting with 

what spices work best with the healthforce nutritionals EARTH 

it has this slightly minty flavor 

which I THINK comes with the red clover

I'm overly sensitive to that flavor

I had very active DREAMS but I can't remember 

I watched a thing 

about the shroud of turin 

it was really interesting 

BUT 

un-vetted

LIKE 

who made this video & what are their credentials 

I didn't check

BUT 

it was fascinating 

I've never been very interested in the shroud 

I remember when they were studying it

BACK in the DAY

BUT 

I just didn't really 

CARE

this did all kind of DNA

all my feed is DNA now

the shroud

traveled 

it was

a traveling reliquary 

& it picked up

DNA

from people from all across the world

POLLEN

from thistles from the Israeli desert

some STORY 

about radiation burns -- or something 

biochemical explanations 

for the redness

of the blood

linen deterioration matching to masada 

I still don't know what I THINK about the shroud 

I MEAN 

if all of that is TRUE 

it MIGHT mean SOMETHING 

it SEEMS odd

that I still don't really CARE 

BUT 

I MEAN 

if jesus was

an alien or an embodied god

do you THINK he cares whether I'm worked up about his burial shroud

goodnight sweetheart

I need to sleep 

I don't really know what to say about today 

she's less psychotic 

since the place she is now

looks like a hospital 

instead of a nursing home 

I LOVE you VERY much sweetheart 

good morning sweetheart

I don't remember my dreams 

BUT 

I woke up

HAPPY 

good morning sweetheart 

I hope you have a beautiful day 🫶