i'm gonna try to describe last night's dream but it was strange and like uber-symbolic in a confusing way, there was a LOT of HAIR

i flew to, i think, england
and i stopped at some slightly swanky hotel
and i was going to some show which didn't turn out to be a show at all
i got there, and it wasn't a bar
it was like a house party, except
it was really just a party at someone's house that i sort of crashed
there were all these young guys who were in bands, german bands
and i don't even think it was one band, they just all knew each other
and the man i love
him i almost didn't recognize
he had long hair and long beard and long mustache
he looked like one of those guru-spiritual-leader-type guys from the 70s
and he came up to me and kissed me
but there was so much hair that our lips didn't even touch
it was weird
and it didn't draw any attention at all
it was like he kissed everybody and it was just a sign that, like
it was ok for me to be there
there was music, there was food, there was beer
and i wasn't sure it was okay for me to have anything
because it didn't seem right, since i was party crashing
and people just did what they did and moved around and played guitar
but he and i didn't say a word
we just looked at each other across the room, across these young guys, whatever
and i fell asleep in the chair, it was a comfortable chair
and the next morning i woke up and it wasn't weird at all
i went into the kitchen with this guy whose house it was
and we were talking and i started to do the dishes and we kept talking
it was all very intimate and there was a way in which it seemed like this man
was also the man i love like he was contained somehow in all these people
we were talking so comfortably and i was pulling out clothes from my bag to wash
and i looked over
he was standing naked in the kitchen
i was startled
because even though he was sort of the man i loved he was also sort of not
and anyway, there hadn't been anything to suggest nakedness
in the kitchen
in the morning
but it was not frightening, just unexpected
there was so much hair
like a bush from just above the hips to almost the knees
but it was beautiful somehow
the tightly curling hair
i couldn't take my eyes off of it
and then his wife came in and he introduced us
and she looked like an oklahoma sunflower
like this girl i used to know and wanted in the kind of way
that makes you never want to fuck them (purely and she was seventeen)
so maybe it was that
or maybe i was the name she had that name
and i gathered up my clothes and went to wash them
but i wasn't upset
it wasn't sexual or non-sexual it was naked and beautiful
and then i went outside
i hadn't realized before, but it was an earth sheltered building
it was dry and the dirt was loose and it had the feeling of a compound, somehow
and the man i loved was there, outside
bearded and long haired again like the night before
with the young men gathered around him
i went up to talk to him
but i can't remember what he said
and i thought: i could stay here, i don't need to go back to the hotel
and that's all i can remember